No Idea...

I have no idea what to write about today. I have nothing on my mind. I'm blank. I figured this would happen at least one day before this blogging thing was over. I just didn't think it would happen this early in the assignment. I really didn't do much this weekend. I didn't feel very good this weekend, so my fiancee and I stayed home. I mean we went to the gym, but we didn't do much there. I guess I could say that I found out some bitter news this weekend. I found out the an uncle of mine passed away unexpectedly. He had a stroke in his sleep. I really don't know what to think about it. I don't even know if I'll be able to attend his funeral, because after my grandma passed away I really don't like funerals. I know I should, because it is the right thing to do, but I don't know if I'll be able to build the courage up to go. Plus, I live two hours away from where the funeral is being held. The other bitter news I found out is that my fiancee's grandpa is having a biopsy on Wednesday. One of his kidneys has shut down and he has a tumor on it. I really don't know what will happen. The worse part about it is that his birthday is next Saturday, three days after the biopsy. You could tell when we were trying to make plans the other day that he didn't really want to make plans. I think he fears something might go wrong. I don't know how I feel about this either. I told my fiancee I will go up to the hospital for him since he'll be at school, but I don't know if I can go to a hospital after my grandma passed away. Again, I know it is the right thing to do, but I don't know if I can do it. My grandma's death has really impacted me. I know I need to get over these fears soon, but it's just hard. I need to be there for my fiancee, but how? I have so many fears. It sickens me really to think about it. I guess I need to overcome these fears this week. No matter how I do it, I need to do it. Hmm...wow. (throw up)